We often think about having a glow up in life. Whether it is to be regular with fitness, to have a better skincare routine, a better diet with no processed foods, upgrade our makeup game, be closer to God. And we do; we find our favourite influencers who show us their routines and we kind of adapt to theirs or take what resonates with our own lives. And then we fall off the glow up wagon. Ever wonder why?
Because to glow up is to grow up. It is a deep dive in our own inner self and find out what makes us, us. It’s a brutal exercise that forces us to call out our limited beliefs and trauma responses and heal from this, so that we can move on and have an inner glow up that reflects outwardly. Still with me?
Okay good. You must be asking, but Dululu girl, I fixed my routines and upgraded my makeup game and I have that Korean glass skin with all these products; I am already doing the ‘glowing’ part right. But are you? Are you doing the shadow work that makes you be lazy with your skincare? Did you ask yourself why I cannot stay to the routine if it’s so good? Maybe because we are kids at a candy store and we like the next shiny new viral toy. Where is the discipline, the loyalty, the self-realisation for what does and doesn’t work for you. To glow up is to be disciplined and thoughtful with your actions, because each action has an equal and opposite reaction.
Life is not a dance of tango, although we all have been there: one step forwards and two steps backwards. Take me for example, I jumped on the fitness bandwagon three years ago, if anything, I have maintained myself, but looking closely at my past pictures, I have not. Why the tango? Commitment issues. I didn’t like the idea of going to the gym three times a week and committing to the same workouts I did for the last few years. I felt like a hamster running on the wheel. and quite literally i did just walk on the treadmill for cardio and still i saw no results. I gave up. And my body got worse.
Then I asked myself why? Why could I not commit to going three hours a week to the gym (for strength training). Turns out I didn’t like how masculine I was feeling in the gym environment. There was no flow and military type workout that I had manufactured, and contrary to popular belief, seeing strength gains made me even more demotivated. I just looked the same but was pulling heavier weight. Who was I trying to impress my sleeper build to? Not myself for sure! I wanted to look dainty and delicate and pull 1.5kg dumbbells and do floor yoga and walk.. no scratch that! I was anti walking for a very long time because of the hamster analogy. Um do cross trainer and have a snatched waist and a big booty. But my diet wasn’t right, my sleep was so-so, i didn’t have rest days and I didn’t listen to my body.
My intuition was off. I was following workout advise from all these male influencers that just wanted to be bigger and stronger. I wanted to be healthier and smaller. Math ain’t mathing. So, I Focused on my nutrition and sleep, did inner work where I found out I have wounded feminine energy which is why I was so in my masculine that even when I tried to be feminine I couldn’t, and just decided to act on my new findings. I now go to the gym thrice a week, do stretching and yoga and yes, walk but in a park where I can just enjoy the fresh air listening to podcasts without having techno blare in my ears. And I have cut back on many exercises that I didn’t think aligned with me. Yes, I am allowed to do that. It’s my body and I know what best works for me. And overall, I have stopped binge eating and sleeping late. All this is showing rapid desired results in my body.
We all have yin and yang energy. People say balance is key, but your balance may not be 50-50, it may be 20/80 where 20 is masculine and 80 is feminine. My advice to you is: do some shadow work, be aware of your wounds, be aware of who you are at your core and let intuition guide you, yes even if you’re masc dom. That will help you cater to your glow up journey. The whole point is to glow up from within. So do the inner work and work out a plan of action for yourself. By doing so, you are unlearning past limiting beliefs and growing to be your beautiful glowing self that stays glowed up. Yes, that’s the key part. You got this!